The Abundant Single Life!

“What’s wrong with me?” It’s a question that often plagues singles that desire to be in a relationship and yet seemingly have no prospects. I have certainly asked this question before, and I have heard single friends entertain it. However, I have found in my experience that this question is not helpful and would be better off silenced. Sometimes there’s absolutely nothing wrong with me but I find myself making something up because I am grasping for a reason of why I am alone. After all, we humans are a curious sort and love to know the “why” behind a situation. At least I do. I personally think this question is straight from the pit of hell disguised in a cloak of false humility. On one hand, it is important to not overlook the things in us that are not right. But on the other hand, I have found this approach to be more harmful than helpful as it typically ends with me becoming self-loathing and attending my very own pity party. I ask, who in the world is that helpful for? Not me. Not...

Spring has arrived and with that the beginning of the wedding season has also come.   The wedding bells are ringing! In the last few months, I’ve seen several people enter a relationship, become engaged, or get married. It has been an abnormal amount of people and ones that have waited for a very long time for their beloved. My own brother is one and I must say, I’m beyond giddy with delight because of this news! I have another friend who I’ve been praying for to be joined with her husband for many years. Guess what? She has met him and is getting married this summer!   God is answering prayers left and right! He is saying, “yes” to the hearts desires of His children. There is a wave of weddings happening this year! So what do we as singles do with that when our own wedding still waits to transpire and we haven’t quite caught the wave yet? Celebrate! That’s what we get to do! Celebrate like it’s your own breakthrough…because it very well could be. Someone else’s break...

Fear is a funny thing. If we give into it, it can make us avoid certain things. Conversely, it can make us jump into things that are not at all God’s best intention for us. Unfortunately, fear has held me back at various times in my life. It has driven me to jump into relationships before consulting God. It has also driven me to avoid guys all together during seasons of my life. Fear is just ugly. But I have discovered something wonderful. When I go sit at the feet of my first love, Jesus, the fear cannot stay. Jesus is the One that gives me courage to step into my destiny because He loves me perfectly. The problem is that I haven’t always been keenly aware that Jesus is the only one who can love me perfectly. Out of that place of looking for others to love me perfectly - pain has been born, wounds have festered, and from those wounds fear knocked at my door. I wish I could say I didn’t open the door. But I did. The story doesn’t end there, thankfully. One of my favorite devotiona...

“Surrender to God is the only way to go from a promise given to a promise fulfilled.”  ~Mercy Lokulutu If you had asked me when I thought I would get married over a decade ago, I would have said, “Soon!” That was my heart’s desires (it still is), and I had no reason to believe it wouldn’t come about on my timetable. But the years passed, I dated a few guys, learned a lot, grew a lot, recovered from having a broken heart more times than anyone should have to, and to this day am still waiting to be joined with the love of my life. Keeping hope alive in my heart has been difficult at times, especially during certain seasons. There were those seasons of recovering from a break up and wondering if my heart could go through getting to know another man. The pain of love lost was so strong and yet each time, God gave me grace to heal and opened my heart to love again. Then there were those seasons when I went years, not days, not months, but y-e-a-r-s without a s...

I recently asked God how He wanted me to position my heart about my future marriage. His answer was to be expectant but not to have expectations. I argued with Him because the truth is it is easier to have an attitude of “oh someday I will be married and my dreams will come true.” But having a heart of expectancy makes me feel like it is immanent…like there is a date in time that has been scheduled for my Divine union with my spouse and it could be just around the corner. The truth is, God does have that date set…I just don’t know what it is yet. It is the uncertainty of the details that makes me uncomfortable. This requires me to exercise my faith, hope, and trust muscles. The difference between expectancy and expectations Let’s take a look at the difference between having expectancy and having expectations. This is how I like to define it. Expectancy attracts what I believe God for through faith with a heart of surrender to the Lord to bring it about however He wants to....